Light the Night for Leukemia - Atlanta 2009

On Saturday, October 10th, my family and I participated in The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society LIGHT THE NIGHT Walk in Atlanta. This was our 3rd annual walk in honor of our dear friend, Jim, who lost his battle with Leukemia in 2007, in support of and with his wife, Nancy, who leads the Team Equifax effort in Atlanta. This year, Team Equifax/Friends of Jordan raised over $13K for research & support. The total raised in Atlanta that night was $1.2 million! It was a beautiful night and LIGHT THE NIGHT is an amazing event each year. Thank you for your support and generous donations.

Mom, I Have a Boyfriend!

I got nothing done today. Nothing. Twitter will be the death of The Rebel Housewife, I'm telling you. Twitter or our Dear Daughter, 12yo Drama Queen, who announced yesterday, upon our return from a fabulous (and kid-less!) weekend getaway: "I have a boyfriend!"

Oh.My.God.

Let's not even talk about Dear Son (The Older), 15yo Puberty Angst Boy, who somehow, over the course of the weekend (and yes, they were supervised -- we did not leave them alone!) shaved.his.eyebrows. Why? I don't know. His answer (and I was really trying to be cool about it, to not over-react and set off TTSD)(Total Teen Shut Down): "Because."

Me: Oh.My.God. (on the inside)
To Him: "Well, honey, are you shaving anything else? Do you need a razor or shaving cream or anything?" Maybe an eyebrow pencil? (again - held that last one in)

So back to 12yo Drama Queen, our tomboy who has thus far spent more time kicking butt and taking names (especially on her two brothers) than noticing the opposite sex...Oh. Maybe this explains the Social Studies grade and how a straight-A 6th grader goes to barely-B average (after you throw that Social Studies grade in there) 7th grader. With a boyfriend.

Okay. Breathe. What does the handbook say?

Oh right. There is no handbook on raising a 12yo Drama Queen. I barely survived 12 the first time, 30 years ago. And here I go again...

Hubby sort of nonchalantly ambled (ran) out of the room at this point in the discussion, so I had to quickly re-group and, as calmly as possible -- THINK before speaking -- ask the pertinent Who? What? Where? When? Why? How? and "Does this involve kissing?" interrogatives...

Who? Okay, I kind of remember seeing this kid in the Orchestra last year. I think he was one of the ones I yelled at for messing around during practice before the teacher arrived. "He's really tall and he has red hair..." (hear in the dreamy voice typically used by Cinderella when mooning over Prince (freaking) Charming)

What? (As in: "What does that mean, he's your boyfriend?")
Response: equivalent of "Duh, Mom" (blush, blush, giggle, giggle)
Me: "Do you two actually talk to each other?"
(Because my 7th grade "boyfriend" and I never said a word to each other -- the whole crushing, three-day romance was managed by our handlers (friends), requiring us only to smile stupidly at each other across the classroom or playground as he played basketball with his buddies (he was tall, too), until he broke up with me (via his handler) for an Older Woman.)
Response: equivalent of "Duh, Mom"

Thirty years later: things are different.

Where? In the cafeteria.
When? At lunch on Friday.
Why? He's really cute.
<< Extended conversation about the single most important thing in any relationship and what I hope for all of my children in their relationships: He's nice to her, really sweet. And funny. >>
How? He asked me.

Oh, wow. I need a minute.

Holding hands? Yes. [Breathe.]
What about kissing? "Ewww, Mom - no! That's just gross!"
(Interpret: I just don't know enough and I'm not ready to try that yet. Which is okay. Fine.)

Summary 42yo Brilliant Mom-advice to 12yo Drama Queen:
1) You know you can always talk to me about anything or ask any questions. You might have to give me a minute, you know, because...well, just because. [Breathe.]
2) 12yo "dating" in our family is group dates only to movies, activities or school events. We are happy to help organize and drive gangs of tweens around -- no solo dating until you are older (some as-yet undetermined age).
3) As for the kissing, there is plenty of time, so take it slow. I had my first "boyfriend" in 7th grade, too, but I didn't have my first kiss until I was...like...25...
No, okay, I was already married by 25...16?

And at that moment, I looked at my beautiful little girl...and I saw the amazing woman she is already becoming. 7th grade. Was I ever this young and innocent? Where did my chubby little ballerina baby go and how did it go so very quickly? The little girl in me looked at the soon-to-be grown-up woman in her and I told her the truth, honestly: My first kiss was in the 8th grade, at the end of 8th grade, and I was 14 years old, almost.

Oh, but honey, take your time.

Sex.y Hot Mamas - yes, I mean YOU!

I have been working on a really fun - FUN! - project today, prepping a weekly Romance newsletter for us Sexy Hot Mamas (and the Mens, too - can't call you Papas, because, well...just not appropriate this week, with Mackenzie Phillips in the news)(ewww).

Happily married for 20+ years, I'm the first to admit there is always room for a new idea: something different, fun, exciting, etc. I'm all about learning new tricks!

I'm having a great time just going through the edit process here...check it out:

Mid-Life Assessment

Sometimes I feel like there is so much to say, to talk about, to write...it is almost overwhelming. Is anybody listening anyway? Does any of it really matter? In the end, the abundance of ideas, thought and potential communication is, strangely enough, paralyzing and can keep one from accomplishing anything at all -- well, at least what was intended, on the To Do List. There is no question of accomplishment, by the very fact of getting through each day with self, family and home mostly intact. It's just that damn list -- it never goes away!

Okay, that's going to worry some people. But it shouldn't. I'm fine, everybody and everything is great and life is good. I'm just going into October, my season of inspiration and renewal, wondering what the heck I'm doing in life, with my life. When I turn 42, one month from yesterday, will I finally have it all figured out? I don't think so.

Uh-oh. Mid-life assessment, is that what this is?
Am I who/what/where I thought I would be?
No, but...
Am I happy with who/what/where I am?
Yes, but...

What to do with the time I have left, always realizing that could be another 42 years, 42 hours or 42 minutes...wouldn't that be creepy, if in 42 minutes...well, check on me at 10:28AM, okay? I'll Twitter something on @rebelupdate, where I have been very active and chatty and networking, loving the Twitter in 140-character sound bites -- donut-holes of thought -- fast-moving conversation and information.

The blogging, quite honestly, starts to feel like a lonely, desolate wasteland, where we're all just writing, writing, writing...but nobody has time to listen, to read, to respond or interact anymore. I am guilty of that myself.

I'm not sure what to do about that yet, but I'm going to go read and meditate, and in the Silence, find the inspiration and answers to these most fundamental questions -- and if not that, at least the answer to what to do next. And then I'll Twitter.

Dominick Dunne (1925 - Aug. 26, 2009)

August 26, 2009 - Sad to hear news of Dominick Dunne's death today. He was one of my most-favorite author/journalists. I loved his books, fiction and non-fiction, and his social chronicles and courtroom reporting on all the high-profile cases for Vanity Fair. I've missed his column in the magazine. He was epic cool and a class act -- you know, from the outside, of course. I really liked his style! He was a fatherish figure for me (he having lost his daughter; me having lost my father) and a role model of a great writing career.

In honor of Dominick Dunne (1925 - Aug. 26, 2009):
REBEL REVIEW - BOOKS: Guilty Pleasures